Jay Willoughby was a kid I knew since kindergarten. He had a serious learning disability, and I would say that he was borderline retarded.
He was one of the ugliest people I have ever met. God cursed him with extremely buck teeth and huge ears, plus the lankiest body ever. He was made fun of constantly.
There are endless tales about Jay, and I’m sure everyone that went to school with him can tell you about a time that he was thrown in the showers, or locked in a closet, hell, I can even remember teachers making fun of him.
The two stories that stick out the most in my mind are:
1) Someone duck taped him to a tree once and then gave him a fucked up haircut. After they cut his hair they just left him on the tree and his neighbors had to cut him loose. His hair was seriously fucked. It was like 3 Mohawks that joined in different parts, and one section of his head was completely bald. Instead of getting clippers and just shaving it off, Jay wore this hairstyle until it eventually grew out. It was endless comedy for anyone that saw him.
2) Jay once tried to make a homemade bomb in his back yard. I’m not sure if he actually knew what he was doing, and this was pre-9/11, pre columbine, and I can remember that no one even questioned why he was making a bomb. Its jay, who the fuck knows. Well, the bomb exploded in his face, and he had gun powder imbedded all over it. His face was literally filled with little black dots. It probably stayed that way for over a year. This could be due to the fact that he never washed his face, or they could have been really deep in his skin. No one asked or cared.
One of my friends named their dog Jay Willoughby.
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3 comments:
I know someone that named thier vibrator Jay willoughby...and dude, the banjo player from DELIVERENCE reminds me of jay, but with musical talent. Poor guy. He used to say, "I aint rich like you, so leave me alone." Like I was fucking rich...I'm from Denton...remember him at Tom Launa's party? I wonder if he is still alive. That motherfucker should have joined the army...He probably has some anger issues he could take out on IRAQIS...who named thier dog Jay? Or is that just fiction?
Bobby Means named his dog Jay. i remember trying to pee on him at Tom Launa's party because he woke me up. that fucking hilarious that he said he wasnt rich like you! there is no way he could get into the army. i seriously think he was retarded.
He woke us up because he was trying to bum some beer off of us...."C'mon guys give me some beers, please help me out" he whined...So instead of beating up someone that pathetic, we thought it would be better to piss on him to make him go away...I know what your thinking, this sounds awful, but this was Jay, and any code of ethics we had (which wasn't much) was waived when it came to Jay. Just as we got out of the van, Tom Lanna's mom came out of nowhere and told us to leave him alone and told Jay to get the hell out of there, we were all tired and just got back in the van and crashed.
You all know the rest from one of the Earlier Tall Tales...
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